Dexter Gabbard

Dex, how much I have thought of you  is un-measurable, Still  so shocking. I ask why all the time. Why you? Why now? Why so soon? just Why? I just wish there had been more time. So crazy how you never know from one day to the next if you can lose someone that means the world to you. I just want you to know you will never be forgotten and you will always be remembered. Miss you so much what I wouldnt do for one more phone call. love you doll.. love ya forever til we meet again, love kaeleen

We recently went through some pics and this reminded me of our camp out (Dex and many other fraternity brothers and wifes/dates)  in the mountains (one of my rare ones).  Susan was getting crazy with a sparkler and the kids were loving it.  It just reminded me of when we all went white water rafting and then camped out and had the park ranger come at 2 in the morning and tell us other campers were complaining.  I guess they did not like us shooting bottle rockets at the other peoples tents, pouring candle wax on other peoples hands when they were not looking  (I think BC's), and setting off all types of other fire works all around the woods (not real smart on our part).  Great time with a great bud. 

I miss you so much and there is not a day that goes by that I don\'t think of you.  Ethan is starting to ask about you and remembers you (he has an incredible memory).   I\'m training hard to ensure I make it to the top of Rainier.  Since we didn\'t get to write our names in the summit log on the last trip due to the time crunch, I promise not leave the summit until I cross the crater and write our names in the log.  I wish you could physically go with me on the trip, but I know you\'ll be there.  Ethan wants to go on the climb also, but he\'s still too young (turning 4 on Sunday) and there is no one else other than you that I trust to go up there with us.  Thanks for putting it all in perspective and for making me a better person. 

Buddy, I told you I would do better of letting you know how the kids were and keep you up to date on my last trip and I am doing my best to keep that promise.  I am amazed at how you touched my son in so short of time.  We cheered for your Philly Eagles to make it to the super bowl (Blanne thought that was pretty cool), but they fell short.  I am trying to get Brooklin into Reggae instead of some of the R & B she likes because momma does not like some of the words or way they talk (sing).  She seems to like all music (except some of that head banging - make your ears bleed stuff you listened to).  I hope this pic comes out of Brooklin, I had a hard time with it. 

I think back to High school and where you and I first met and wonder how we became so close.  We just had so many things in common and you were always there for me.  Not sure I ever said thanks for that, so "Thanks".  Miss you so much.  Watch over your mom, Shannnon, the kids and David.

Well I told you I would send pictures when I saw you in Sept.  I am a man of my word.  I was going through this one and although it was old, I thought it was perfect for new years eve.  It put a smile on my face as you did on many new years.  As you can see we have no rules on the back deck of our house.  I am sure the neighbors love us for it, but I could give a flip. 

I hope you are checking in to read all these good things said about you from Reenie, David, Shannon,  Jess, T, Carmella, kaeleen, Sean, etc.  Many good stories of you bro.  Just wish I was still coming down for you to catch me up on all of these from them.  I did not know that many people actually liked you.  Just kidding.  Now that the man above took you to help out, I have no one to really kid around with on a daily basis.  I would do it with Susan, but she may think I was serious and I would get a shoe upside my head.

 

I miss my best friend and wonder daily why it happened.  I am real glad that Susan made the journey with me in Sept.  She and I still talk about how lucky we were to come then.  Happy new year bro.  Love ya and I always have.

 

Dex,my Sweetest~ I just got off of work and once again, wishing you were here with me. I miss you so much, ur silly jokes cheering me up.. ur great advice..ur love & companionship. The calendar you made me is almost over, I wish so badly that you could make me another. I will cherrish this one forever. Remember how CRAZY it was that we were both secretly making eachother personalized calendars, to suprise eacother?! ( I still say you snuck & saw that I was, & copied me!;) Just teasing. For someone to take so much time & consideration for me, means so much. You are one of a kind and I am so glad and honored to have known you. Yesterday was our anniversary, and I could only imagine what you would have had planned up your sleeve. Mom cooked dinner for us, in your memory.(She tried to remember what u taught her, but we all know is wasn't even comparable!) It was so sweet of her, she misses you. I love and miss you more than I can express in words. You're the best. Heaven is lucky. XOXOXO~ your baby girl

Just remembering  this time last year, trying to figure out what we were going to get each other and thinking how much you would be surprised at what one of your gifts were.  You so loved Christmas and didn't really care what you got.  You invited Matt over and we went to the Italian grocery store and bought great steaks.  You made the best marinade I ever had.  You did baked sweet potatoes, and a salad to die for.  I made a homemade cheesecake. I kept saying this was not what we should be having for a Christmas dinner and I just knew inside I was not going to like it because it was not the traditional dinner.  Well needless to say you were right again and I was wrong.  I told you so and then said I would have to get the recipe for that marinade and salad dressing.  Of course I didn't and have no idea of what you even put in it.  How I miss you Dexter and your excitment and joy over things small or large.  I just pray that you knew just how much you meant to me because I know that I was hard at times but my love NEVER was.  You were the world to me and I've always said even before you died that my purpose of this earth was to be your mother and I knew that the moment you were born.   I love you Dexter

Well Dex, my son keeps amazing me with thoughts on you.  I did not realized and am impressed how you touched my son (my stories probably help you out though;-) ).  We put up the Christmas tree this past weekend.  He came across a picture of yours, while running around the house (he was slacking in his help role).  He asked me if we could put the picture of you on the Christmas tree.  This would help us remember "Uncle Dex" each year. So, your ugly mug is on my tree and will be every year ;-).  I know you gotta be smilin.  We also put an Angel ornament on one side of the picture (Blanne calls you our guardian Angel - lord knows he needs one).  We put a UK Wildcat with a basketball ornament on the other side of you.  Merry Christmas a little early, buddy.  Miss you daily and so much wish you were still with all of us.

WEEKS AND MONTHS GO BY SINCE MY UNCLE DIED.BUT MY MEMMORIES OF HIM WILL ALWAYS BE WITH ME.2 YEARS AGO WHEN I WAS IN SIX GRADE HE CAME DOWN TO CELEBRATE CHRISTMAS WITH ME.EVERYONE NOTICE THE BIGGEST PRESENT HTAT UNCLE BROUGHT IN WAS FOR ME.I COULDN'T WAIT TILL TOMMOROW TO OPEN IT.BUT AS SOON AS MY SISTER SAW IT,IT WAS LIKE EVIL STRUCK HER FACE.SHE CAME UP TO ME AND SAID,"THAT PRESENTS FOR JUST YOU KNOW ONE ELSE JUST YOU!!"SHE JUST WOULDN'T STOP YELLING UNTIL SOMEONE TOLD HER TO BE QUIET.THE NEXT DAY WHEN I OPENED IT I WAS SHOCKED BECAUSE IT WAS SOMETHING THAT I THOUGHT I WOULD NEVER GET,"A GUITAR"THEN I REALIZED WHY I GOT IT BECUASE WHEN I WAS ABOUT 5 I WOULD TRY TO WRITE A SONG FOR HIM WHILE I WOULD TRY TO PLAY HIS GUITAR.THEN AFTER THE FEAST WE HAD MY UNCLE PLAYED ME A SONG THAT GUITAR I WILL ALWAYS CHERISH FOR MY TIME ENDS.AS SOON AS I LEARN HOW TO PLAY,I WILL WRITE SONGS FOR MY UNCLE EVERY DAY SO HE CAN HEAR MY VOICE KNOWING THAT I LOVE AND MISS HIM WAITING US TO REUNITE AGAIN.

Today a reminder came up on your computer that it was Samantha's birthday and it will be Shauna's birthday in 3 days.  I know how much you loved your nieces and always wanted to succeed so much so that you could be sure  that they all had enough to go to college (and hopefully it would be UK).  I remember how much they loved to see their Uncle Dexter and how crazy you would act with them.  They loved being with you going to the Ray's game, mexican and seafood, beaches, playting board games and cards and just plain having fun with you.  I am so sorry that they  will not have anymore of that with you and just pray that the memories of the past stary with them.  We all have a "HUGE" hole in our hearts and miss you so much.  I pray heaven is all that you hoped and expected it to be.  Watch over us and please put in a word for us to make it easier without you.  I love you 

I met Dexter in Wildflecken, Germany through Shannon.  He was always there looking out for you Shannon.  He cared so much through all your wild days back then.  I haven't seen him since I graduated but Shannon you always told me how wonderful he was doing.  I am so sorry for your loss.  Please know that I am here for you, your children, and Reenie.  I love you all.  Micci

Dex. tommorrow is thanksgiving and I just want you to know some of the things that I am thankful for, The first is I want to thank you for sharing a piece of your life with me. Thank you for taking time out of your days to make mine brighter. Thanks for showing me that people are still capable of unconditional love without wanting in return. Thanks for being a friend, a gentleman, an amazing guy, funny, loving, silly, complimentary, and full of life. I  miss you so much, there was just not enough time for me to share all the things I wanted to. Dex you will never be forgotten you made a lasting imprint on my heart, I think of you everyday.. I miss you Dexter.. Be with your mom and sister and your family and friends through the holidays. I know its going to be a sad time for everyone. Happy Thanksgiving Dexter. lots of love always. And Carmella I want to say thanks for this beautiful website It helps to share memories. miss you Dex... 

DEX, I thought you would get a kick out of this.  I sent it to David and Reenie, but I still get a giggle out of it.

 

Blanne and I went to a basketball game last night and got home late on a school night.  Yet, he WOULD NOT go to bed without an Uncle Dex story.  So I told him the story of how you and I were at a gas station and you lost your keys.  We looked for an hour inside and outside of the store.  We were then both looking inside the Shell station and I see you out of the corner of my eye with a big smile (to yourself).  I then tell Blanne --- "You know what I saw Uncle Dex do"? - What dad? --- I then see Mr. Dex reach in the top of his elastic shorts to find that he has had his keys all along.  Yet, he does not want anyone to know that he has had them the entire time so he slowly pulls them out (trying not to make any sound) and throws them on the ground by the bottled drinks.  Then he says "G, I found them".... turning around as he said it just to see me right by his side laughing (as he always made me do).  I greatly miss you man..

 

Oh yeah....

Blanne thinks you are a silly man.  (As we all should be).  I enclosed a picture of him, since you always asked for them and I always forgot to send them.  I will have one of Brooklin for you next.  She is into making herself up now and colored her entire babies head in lipstick.  Gotta love it.

 

Wish you were here.  Life is not the same.

 

Dex, I was thinking of the first day I met you.  What a nice guy you were. How driven  happy  and persistent. We have been friends every since that day in Coral Reef.  You have been there for me for the last 6 years, to talk to, to share stories and laughs and you were always intrested in what intrested me. Dex thanks for touching my life. And being such an amazing friend. I miss you so much. One of the last texts you sent, meant the world to me.  Thanks for making my world a better place to be. Be with your loved ones Dex for I know they are hurting unimaginably. "Take care doll" lots of love

 

As Thanksgiving is approaching I think of all the holidays that we had together.  He of course being in the kitchen helping me cook.  He loved my stuffing and of course we proceed to tell me that I did not chop the onions right and he would take over for me.  He would tell me that next year we would need to just cook a healthy Thanksgiving dinner and of course we never did and then he would eat and eat and take home some and again saying  ok, next year we won't do this we will have a healthy dinner.  How I will miss him this time.  Thanksgiving will be alot healthier and sadder this year.  He could make a mean pumpkin cheesecake......  I love you toooooooo much my son.....

Grant and I used to have these crazy halloween parties--and OF COURSE Dex always was present.  His creativity was given another chance to shine and get out to play.  I remember he was late one year, and G called and called.  In comes this person with a BRIGHT pink dress, pearls around their neck, way too much matching pink lip stick, an aweful black wig, heels and oh yes black hose with a HUGE run down one leg.  Yes, it was our Dex--what laughter we always got from him.  We still miss him so, but I try my best to remember the advice, stories and moments I was able to share with him.  We hold on to those very tightly.   Our 6 year old saw a bright star the other night and said thats gotta be Dexter's.  He will always be a bright shining star........ 

Dex, I know we were talking about Allison Krauss so I just wanted you to know that Im playing this song for you. I hope your smiling down from heaven. And I watched your dolly video you were telling me about. You always make me smile. Thanks for the memories laughs  your thoughtfullness, and your conversations. you are a special guy. Sorry I didnt get to see your work you were telling me about, Time is a thief and it stole you to soon. You still had so much to offer to the world, but something and someone greater needed you for bigger things. May you have wings and fly with your free spirit. Stand beside the ones that are hurting and comfort them for even though your gone your needed forever and always. Youll never be forgotten, you made an impact on the world and left an imprint on everyone you came in contact with. I cry because I will miss you but I know we will meet again. Tell your jokes and keep heaven laughing.. I miss you Dex... take care doll love always kaeleen

When I got a new job at Verizon,  I was so unprepared for the my new responsibilities.  I had no training and everyone around me was too busy to help me learn....except for Dexter.  He came to me and volunteered to help me.  We scheduled time together so that I could learn from him.  I will never forget his kindness.  This was  seven years ago.  Now, when others are struggling to learn, I always remember how good Dexter made me feel and I work really hard to be as patient as he was with me.   This is a gift from him that I hope to pass to others. 

I met Dexter while working at GTE in Nashville TN.  I was new to the world of wireless but Dexter (and Sean Rose) made my transition into the company very easy.  We became very good friends and spent a lot of hours talking about business opportunities. I admired his zeal for life, honesty, friendship, and his ability to stay positive.  In August, we worked on a business deal together.  Dexter was a creative thinker and extremely entrepreneurial.  I will miss his energy and friendship. His spirit will live on and he will be truly missed.

I"m sorry for the lost of Gaby that is what I knew him as.  His mother and my mother were friends.  Both of our families were stationed in Wildflecken Germany.  They lived up stairs from us.  He was a funny guy, he always said that I had big yaboos.

I came across this web page my mistake.  I was just wondering the internet and was looking up my old high school.  Wurzburg American High School class of 1983.

I'm very sorry.

Where to begin? I have so many wonderful memories but the one that sticks in my mind the most and still makes me laugh even in a time like this is when we lived in Alabama and both my parents had left for work and he was responsible for getting me up and dressed for school.  Well this particular morning he couldnt find my clean school clothes and grabbed something out the laundry hamper, I didnt want to wear those clothes they were dirty and alittle smelly, he said " just put them on it'll be fine, so trusting my brother I did! The next thing i know i started to smell something it was my clothes so Dexter being the brilliant problem solver ran to the bathroom and grabbed my moms deoderant and begin rubbing it all over my clothes, saying see they smell ok so lets go.  We started walking to school and all of a sudden i look at my clothes and big white streaks had formed all up and down my body. Dexter began laughing at me and said look just roll around in the grass and the dew will make the deoderant disappear so again trusting my brother i did!  Well needless to say after the now grass stains and deoderant all over me i ran home crying with Dexter chasing me begging me not to call our mother.  Well I did anyway and I got to stay home from school and Dexter got grounded.  I share that story with my kids and I know Dexter did as well cause they remind of this time alot... I have so many funny and memorable stories to share but that is one the best ones that I will always have and cherish.  I love and miss him so much and life just wont be the same without my big bro..  I love u Dex!!!!

I met Dex back in the GTE Mobilnet days, when he was in Tennessee and I worked in Georgia.  We became remote friends working on store operations issues.  One spring I put together a group of guys to go to fly fishing school in southern Virginia, and Dex came along.  As always, Dex was generally all smiles and great to be around.  There were several memorable stories we still retell about the "ax murderer" at the Hiwassee river campground, and the potato vodka that flowed every night in camp at Hungry Mother State Park.  Another summer Dex invited me along on a trip with some of the men folk from his family and we camped and fished at River Ridge campground in Elizabethton, TN.  There was considerable whiskey and merriment around the campfires those nights, so much so that even the gravel my tent was set up on felt pretty soft to sleep on.  We didn't talk as much after he left Verizon and went to Florida, but Dex is a guy you could talk to after a year or two and pick right up like you talked to him yesterday.  I have no bad memories of Dex and will miss knowing he is around to meet up with another day.

Today I found myself desperately searching for old pictures of Dexter.  I sit and smile as memories flood over me...It was my first year in high school and this beautiful boy with the deepest brown, puppy dog eyes I have ever seen said hello to me and smiled...I loved him instantly and followed him everywhere!  He made my high school experience one filled with laughter and warmth.  Dexter was an amazing soul with a vitality and sense of humor that noone could deny.  I am blessed that I had a moment of his life. 

Dexter was the most passionate, caring, funny, determined, and happy person that I have ever met and I miss him dearly. He was more than a friend, he was a brother.

 

Dex and I first met while working for GTE in Nashville and quickly became friends. One day we started talking about places we wanted to go and things we wanted to do and soon we had an elaborate plan to start hiking the Appalachian Trail. On our first hike we carried 50+ pound packs in the middle of July in Georgia, not realizing that both were really, really bad ideas. Despite the challenges, by the end of our hike we had already planned another trip.

 

My adventures with Dex took me all over North America from the summit of Mt. Rainier at over 14,000 feet to Bad Water Basin, the lowest spot in the United States at 190 feet below sea level. We hiked over 150 miles together on the Appalachian Trail and encouraged each other on our guideless summit climb of Mt. Shasta. We stood on the edge of cliff at Half-Dome in Yosemite with only inches separating us from the valley floor over 4,500 feet below. We traveled to Victoria British Columbia, Whistler Canada and many, many other places.

 

We conquered mountains together and I literally trusted him with my life.

I always knew that everything would work out and be ok if he was around. Regardless of where we traveled, his strong spirit lit the way as he positively impacted the lives of those he met.

 

Throughout our travels, we shared ideas, stories, memories and dreams. We talked about our future trips to Kilimanjaro and Denali, rafting the Grand Canyon, searching for Bigfoot, going on a treasure hunt, taking my son on his first mountain climbing trip and how funny it would be when we were really old sitting in rocking chairs and grossly exaggerating all of our adventures. He talked about what was right in the world, appreciated the small things and was determined to always do the right thing and put others first. He made me a better person and he led by example.

 

He always said that I had a terrible sense of direction and now, for the fist time in my life, I feel truly lost and empty and I can’t believe he's gone.

 

May the road rise to meet you,
May the wind be always at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your face,
And until we meet again,
May God hold you in the palm of his hand.

 

 

Climb On My Brother